To the tune of "Walking in a Winter Wonderland"

Five a.m., walkin' doggie

But my pant-legs are soggy

Any walk is too long

'Cause it's horribly wrong

To be walkin' in a winter thunderstorm.

I am wet, and it's frightnin'

To be dodging bolts of lightnin'

I'm cold and I'm scared

I wasn't prepared

To be walkin' in a winter thunderstorm.

In the neighbor's yard we stop to potty,

Doggie takes a squat so he can poop,

I'm thinkin' this behavior's kind of naughty,

Because I didn't bring a pooper scoop.

On the mailbox he's peein'

While my wet feet are freezin',

There's thunder o'erhead

I miss my warm bed

Walkin' in a winter thunderstorm.

The doggie thinks that this is kinda funny

'Cause the weather doesn't bother him.

I've got the sniffles, nose is kinda runny

And I'm tired of dodging falling limbs.

Dog's behavin' kinda bratty

Wants to chase the neighbor's cattie (I know, I really stretched for a rhyme there, sorry)

He just wants to roam

But I'm draggin' him home

Tired of walkin' in a winter thunderstorm.