I'm just feeling really defeated. All of the great things I had planned to do this summer haven't happened, and the first day of school is four weeks from today, less than a month away. I thought I would have all this time to work out--between my class, the boys, vacation, and having company on an extended visit, I haven't worked out once. We ate and drank a lot on our vacation, and since we have company we've been cooking dinner more (which means I end up eating more). I haven't lost a single pound, even with all the walking we did in Yellowstone. With company in the house, I feel weird trying to get in a workout at home, but I can't really leave my company alone to get in a workout elsewhere. So I feel like a miserable, fat lump.
I had also thought I'd get lots of reading done this summer. I wanted to get a lot of the research for my class done, and get a bunch of new lesson plans written. I plan on working on school stuff after my company leaves, but I haven't gotten all these new books read yet, and I'm running out of time. I haven't even finished my book club book, a biography of Harper Lee, and I only have two weeks left to do that before we meet to discuss it.
I wanted to get all of my writing from my class edited and posted on my blog, but I ran out of steam and time. The writing that I was so enthusiastic about while I was in the class isn't nearly so compelling now, and I haven't written much of anything else.
I had lots of chores I need to do at home, rearranging closets, cleaning out all the mouse poop in the kitchen cabinets, sorting through the boys' clothes and toys to get rid of stuff that doesn't fit or that they don't play with. I need to finish the headboard that my mother-in-law and I made; I think she's disappointed I haven't gotten it done yet. I haven't gotten any of those or a dozen other things done.
I just feel lost, directionless. I don't know how to fix this funk I'm in. I hate feeling this way.
