OK, I need to clarify that I do not listen to country music.  Oh, I'll admit that there are occasionally songs I do enjoy, much in the same way I occasionally have strange cravings for bologna.  Don't know why, and thankfully neither compulsion rears its head too often.  

However, every once in a while a country song comes along that is so very, very country that it's simply hilarious.  The song that's been stuck in my head now for a couple of days is just such a song.  It's "Goodbye Earl" by the Dixie Chicks.  Basically, it's about a woman who gets abused by her husband and decides to kill him off.  Not normally something I would consider funny by any stretch of the imagination, but the way they approach the song is with a significant measure of silliness, and the video is a riot.  A number of well-known actors and actresses contributed to it: Dennis Franz of NYPD Blue fame, Jane Krakowski from Ally McBeal, Lauren Holly from NCIS, and Adrian Pasdar from Heroes.  This song just tickles me, in the same way I'm horrifically entertained by "Pickup Man" by Joe Diffie.  It's just so very, very country.  (Note: Both of these songs are not particularly recent, which is another way you can tell I don't often listen to country.  When I do, it's usually older country, like Kenny Rogers and Alabama.)

Anyway, since the stupid song is stuck in my head, I figured I'd share it around.

First Thanksgiving without my mom. I know this cartoon was actually written about Johnny Hart, who drew B.C. for years, but somehow it was very fitting for me.

There's something about the Christmas season that brings out the best in people, and something about the Christmas SHOPPING season that brings out the worst in people. Every year you see the footage on the news of the men and women wrestling in the Walmart aisles over some random toy that has been promoted as THE toy to have that year. I remember as a kid hearing about people being trampled in shopping malls as they scrambled for Cabbage Patch Kids. (Note: My parents did not participate in such nonsense. Christmas 1983 was the year of the Cabbage Patch Kid; I didn't get mine until my birthday, in October of 1984. While I was disappointed that I didn't get the Cabbage Patch Kid for Christmas, I don't think I have any lasting scars from such deprivation. I think.)

Anyway, we don't have kids, so we have never really gotten to participate in the upper level Christmas shopping craziness. We've never gone for any really trendy gifts for our nieces (the trendiest was the Chicken Dance Elmo, a gift I think my sister-in-law and her husband still hold against us).

However, this year we've rubbed elbows with the insanity. We decided (far too late in the season, apparently) that a good gift for my sister-in-law's family would be a Nintendo Wii. One of my best friends has one, and she said her kids love it, and her parents and grandmother even play with them. It's more of a family console than either the PS3 or the Xbox. It has (from what I've heard) a pretty easy learning curve, and it's even a bit healthier than traditional consoles because of the "wiimote" that requires much more physical movement.

So, we haven't really had a chance to do any shopping yet. We waited until yesterday to go out and start looking. Yeah, we probably waited a few weeks too long. Walmart? Nothing. Circuit City? Nothing. Game Stop? Nothing. Sam's Club? Nothing. Best Buy? Nothing. Oh sure, look online then. Uh, no. Nobody has one. Well, I take that back. Amazon's marketplace (kind of like e-bay) has a few, but they are priced much higher than the actual cost of the console. E-bay also has some, a few edging towards the $500+ range. This is absolutely ridiculous. Circuit City's clerk said they'd put some more out this morning when they opened at ten. A circular came out in this morning's paper advertising them. So what did we see when we drove by Circuit City on our way to the gym? Dozens of cars in their parking lot and a mob of people at the doors, waiting for ten o'clock. Did we stop and join the crowd? Oh, HELL no. We just drove on by.

How is it that a console that has been out for over a year (this is not it's first holiday season) is in such demand? I mean, it isn't even a new toy. So what's the deal?

A clue to this mystery came from the clerk at Game Stop. He said they did have some in stock, but they weren't putting them out until "Black Friday" (the uber-shopping day after Thanksgiving when all the stores have their megasales). And then, each Game Stop in the country was only to put out SIX on Black Friday. And suddenly this all becomes clear. It isn't the toy ITSELF that is creating the hype; it's the manufacturer and the stores that are doing it. The manufacturer holds some back to create a slight shortage. The retailers do the same. And then they advertise advertise advertise the product, getting kids excited about the product and making parents interested in the product. But when they find that the product is hard to get, it creates even more interest and drama. I mean, if you heard that a product was "selling like hotcakes", wouldn't you be curious as to why? Wouldn't it make you wonder, at least a little, how good that product really was? That's exactly what they are doing. And while the product in question, this year the Wii, is pretty cool from all accounts, this artificial hype is inflating the shopping mania surrounding it.

So will we end up getting a Wii for my sister-in-law's family? Probably not this year, unless we happen to stumble across one randomly somewhere. Maybe we can save it for Easter. So what will we get for the kids this year? I don't know. Anybody know some poorly promoted, lead-paint-coated toys we can get for cheap?

OK, just finishing up watching Hot Fuzz. and I must say, it is one of the funniest and stupidest movies I think I've ever seen. Shaun of the Dead too. Great, but really, really stupid.

Dammit. My brother decided to tag me. The rules:
A). Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog...
B). Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself...
C). Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs...
D). Let each person know that they've been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog...

Seven random things:

1. Do all seven tattoos count as my seven random things? They're all in different (inoffensive and non-scandalous) places, and were all gotten at different times...
2. I've gotten thirteen tickets over the years, most of speeding and one for a right-turn-on-red. These tickets have been earned in Utah, California, Wyoming, Colorado, New Mexico, and Tennessee.
3. My favorite book of all time is To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. My least favorite book of all time is The Pearl by John Steinbeck.
4. I'm a member of the "White Car Club of the South" (or, I would be if there were such a thing).
5. The last five songs that came up at random on my iTunes were "Raise the Roof" by Carbon Leaf, "Lost in Love" by Air Supply, "Knockin' on Heaven's Door" by Guns 'N' Roses, "Heart of Rock and Roll" by Huey Lewis and the News, and "100 Games of Solitaire" by Concrete Blonde.
6. My brother got snowed in at Wamsutter, WY on his way back home after my 21st birthday, a weekend I pretty much do not remember.
7. My favorite candy bar is a Milky Way. Or possibly a Snickers. Or maybe Rollos. Or potentially KitKats. Perhaps this is why I have trouble with my weight.

Here's the problem I have with the whole "seven random people". I don't really know seven people who have blogs. I don't really know seven people with Facebook or MySpace profiles either. And while I could actually hit up seven totally random people by just clicking through blogs, that tends to annoy people. So if anyone who reads this would like to contribute, just post your seven random facts as comments.


On to other thoughts.

I narrowly avoided my nemesis twice this week. No, not food or anything like that. I'm talking about the one song that reduces me to a quivering pile of protoplasm: "The Christmas Shoes".

Even before my mother was diagnosed with cancer, I couldn't listen to the darn song. Someone labeled it a Christmas song (I've got news for you, just because a song gets played around Christmas does not mean it's a Christmas song). The first time I ever heard it, on the radio station we have that plays Christmas music nonstop during the holiday season (they just started this week), I had to pull over because I was crying so hard. While I understand the general point of the song is positive (learning the true meaning of Christmas and all that), the fact that the point of the song stems from the horrible tragedy of a young child losing his mother to a terminal illness just seems cruel and not Christmas-like at all.

Of course, when we found out my mom had cancer, the song took on a whole new, much more personal meaning. Certainly listening to a song about a child whose mother was dying was not going to be high on my list of Christmas tunes.

I even told Mom about it last Christmas (and got teary just trying). She had never heard it before. A day or two after I told her about it, she happened to catch the song on the radio, and it made her cry too. It's a horrible, horrible song.

Now that Mom is gone and my first Christmas without her is approaching, "The Christmas Shoes" is pretty much the last song on earth I want to hear. I mean, give me the Spice Girls singing "O Holy Night" or something. Seriously.

So imagine how happy I was to hear that not one but two girls had chosen "The Christmas Shoes" to do their explication projects (the kids got to pick songs and treat them like poems, breaking them down into their literary elements like similes and allusions and then making powerpoints to show their classmates while playing the song). And the girls taking vocal music as a class are singing the very same song at their Christmas concert coming up, so they all wanted to sing along with the music while it played.

What did I do? Did I suck it up and listen to the song, confronting my personal feelings? Hell, no. I put my headphones on and listened to "Take On Me" by Ah-ha and "Highway to Hell" by AC/DC instead.

If this postpones my emotional growth, so be it. At least it kept me from breaking down in front of 20+ freshmen. Twice.

My brother complains that I don't post often enough. He's right; I don't post very often, certainly not often enough to make for an interesting regular destination for anyone. But nothing very interesting happens to me anyway.

My last post had to do with some new goals that I'm working on. After a week, here's where I stand;

Goal #1: Work out at least once per day.

Well, I haven't quite gotten there yet. I worked out Monday morning, not at all on Tuesday, Wednesday morning, not at all on Thursday, and Friday morning and afternoon. Nothing yesterday or today. Eh. I'll start adding workouts this week.

Goal #2: Make at least three morning workouts per week.

Yep. I actually did I. Again, I think I'll try to add at least one more morning this week.

Goal #3: Get caught up and stay caught up on grading.

Making progress here. I have one or two classes with one or two homework assignments left to grade. I've graded all their tests from last week. All I'll have from now until the end of the semester are weekly quizzes, perhaps a few writing assignments, and their poetry projects (they did explications of songs as though they were poems, and they must present their explications to the class. They actually love this assignment. My only problem--I have at least two students who chose to explicate "The Christmas Shoes", a song I couldn't even listen to BEFORE my mom was diagnosed with cancer; now that the first Christmas without her is approaching, I can guarantee I'll have to put headphones on and listen to a different song while the girls play the song for the class). I can grade the explications as they do their presentations, so that means just a few, maybe 4-10 each day. Won't be too bad. Better than 86 a day, anyway...

Goal #4: Be under 180 lbs by Christmas.

So far, little to no progress here. I weighed in this morning at 190. I think as I add workouts the weight will start to drop, but it's pretty frustrating right now.

Goal #5: Keep the house in better shape.

Yeah, haven't done much here either. I will get some dishes and laundry done today, though. Maybe...


On to other random weekend thoughts. We got to discussing this morning the best "gotcha" movies. You know, the movies where someone puts something over on someone else. Here's the list we discussed, plus a few I thought of while walking the dog, in no particular order:

The Shawshank Redemption

Not only just a fantastic movie with terrific acting, but the way in which Tim Robbins' character outfoxes the prison warden using a Bible and posters of attractive women is awesome.

Malice

Not a fabulous movie overall, but the plot twist at the end where the little boy who is supposedly the witness turns out to be blind is great, and Alec Baldwin's monologue about being God is probably one of the best speeches ever written.

The Thomas Crown Affair--the one with Pierce Brosnan; I know this is a remake

Not particularly realistic: I seriously doubt that there are many art insurance agents who look and dress like Rene Russo, but the scene where Crown returns the painting is classic.

The Bourne Trilogy, especially The Bourne Supremacy

All three of these movies are wonderful; they really make me appreciate the talent of Matt Damon. Rarely do I find movies based on books where I like the movies better, but this is definitely the case with these movies. The only fault I had with the series was the camera work in the third movie; they used hand-held cameras to try to capture the chaos of the chase, but all it really did was give me a bit of a headache. It's like they didn't trust Damon to be able to carry it off. They should've had faith in him. But the lines in the second movie alone make the whole series a keeper. When he tells the FBI agent at the end that she should get some rest because she looks tired and she realizes he can see her, it just gives you shivers. Good stuff.

The Usual Suspects

This is probably the best of all the "gotcha" movies. Kevin Spacey spins the tale of Keyser Soze brilliantly. When he walks out of the police station, turns the corner, and then suddenly straightens out his limp, interspersed with the detective inside suddenly putting the pieces together...man, that might be the best scene in cinema. Ever.

The Saint

Not a particularly great movie; no one has ever said that either Elisabeth Shue or Val Kilmer deserve Oscars for anything, but Val Kilmer pulls off the cleverness of the master-of-disguise Simon Templar very well. He actually does a pretty good job with the accents, too.

The Italian Job--the remake with Mark Walberg

A fun way to put one over on a bad guy. Plus, a truly great car chase, albeit one using wussy little Minis. Still cool.

Ocean's Eleven--again, the remake with George Clooney

I'm not a huge Clooney fan. However, the talent assembled in the movie is good, the story is great, and they do carry it off well. I've seen Ocean's Twelve but don't remember much about it because I was on the phone with someone for most of it. Never saw Ocean's Thirteen but I've been told by a number of people that Eleven was the best of the three.

Diggstown

I don't know how many people have seen this Lou Gossett Jr. and James Wood movie about boxing. I do know it's one of the few movies my father-in-law will admit to liking. in this one, Gossett is an over-the-hill boxer who, with the help of more-than-slightly-crooked Wood, has to fight and defeat ten boxers in 24 hours. Just when it looks like the bad guy, Bruce Dern, has pulled one over, Gossett and Wood return the favor and win the bet.

The Sting

Of course, this is the classic, the one that started it all as far as great con movies. How can you turn down Paul Newman and Robert Redford? And all set to the music of Scott Joplin? Truly magical.

If we think of any more, we'll add them to the list. Anyone think of any others?

Erk. OK, 104 weeks ago this week (Wednesday, specifically), I set out to lose some weight. I decided that 218.4 lbs was way too heavy for someone 5'7" with a medium bone structure. So my husband and I embarked on a journey that involved eating less and exercising more. My original plan was to drop approximately 70 lbs, putting me under 150 lbs for the first time since college, and putting me under my high school graduation weight. It seemed like a monumental task. But as we started out, motivating each other and trying to be good about eating, it was amazing at how the weight started to drop off. We'd lose sometimes over four lbs in a week! I figured we'd be at our target weights in no time. Sure enough, by the beginning of the summer I was in the 170s and feeling great. I'd lost about 40 lbs, well over half my intended goal.

And then we got lazy.

It crept in gradually. We'd talk ourselves out of a work-out. We'd go hit a restaurant on the way home and eat a big dinner. We stopped our two-a-day workout schedule. And suddenly, the weight stopped dropping off. And sure enough, after a while, the weight started creeping back on.

And for the next year, if you've read this blog semi-regularly, I made resolution after resolution to "get back on it" and start losing weight again. But you also know, it never happened. My weight stayed stagnant at about 180 lbs. I started getting really obsessed with it, and yet at the same time I continued the destructive path of not working out regularly and not eating reasonably. And the weight continued to creep.

I sit here now, having weighed in this morning at 192.2. I'm all the way back up to only about a 26 lb weight loss, really about a third of my intended goal. The clothes that seemed so loose months ago that I thought I'd have to throw them out are back to being tight. I'm tired all the time. I feel like crap. I have no energy, no motivation, no drive to do anything productive. And the attitude has drifted in to the rest of my life. I made a resolution this year to get my papers graded promptly. My elbows are currently resting on the better part of two weeks' worth of homework from my students. I still have assignments from Oct. 8 that I can't bring myself to grade. I take my work for a ride every night--to swim practice, to my house, and back to school--without ever really making a dent in it. And it's super-frustrating. I've been awful about housecleaning, leaving it to my poor husband to do dishes and laundry because I just don't feel like it. I'm coaching swimming and really just "phoning it in" as far as the effort I'm committing to it. It's looking like I won't be coaching lacrosse this spring (not because of my choice but because I've kind of been pinched out by some new coaches, but I'm not fighting it). I really think I'm depressed.

And I don't know how to turn this around. I mean, I know what I need to do--stop eating like a pig, start working out twice a day, and use my time wisely to get my grading done--but I don't know how to MAKE myself do it. How do you motivate yourself when your main problem is a lack of motivation?

Anyway, there is always time to start over.

Goal #1: Work out at least once per day.

I have a gym membership. I also have hand weights, a yoga mat, and one of those big stabilization balls at school. And I can swim before practice on the nights I go.

Goal #2: Make at least three morning workouts per week.

It means getting up at 4:00 in the morning, but the time change this Sunday should make that reasonable.

Goal #3: Get caught up and stay caught up with grading.

This weekend I'm not doing anything other than coaching at a meet and watching some football, so I should be able to knock out much of their papers. Starting in the middle of next week the students will be reading a novel, which means no daily homework to grade (just occasional quizzes). That will help. I hope to be fully caught up with grading by Thanksgiving.

Goal #4: Be under 180 lbs by Christmas.

If I can keep Goals 1 and 2, this shouldn't be a problem. Of course, I have to deal with lots of food at Thanksgiving and Christmas (my in-laws can cook, and do, a lot). But if I try hard enough, I can make it easier on myself.

Goal #5: Keep the house in better shape.

My hubby deserves to have a wife who actually cleans up occasionally. He takes far better care of me than I do of him, and that needs to change.


I think that's enough to start out with, don't you? Stay tuned...