My brother is bemoaning his lack of progress in weight loss recently, brought about by unfortunate scheduling and occasional food indescretions. I also am experiencing this problem. After my horrendous weigh-in at the beginning of the month (188) I saw brief progress (got down to 184), but several more days of eating more than I should of stuff I probably shouldn't be eating at all (damn those french fries!), I bounced back up to 186, where I've sat for several days. No working out of course--today will be the first time in over a week I've hit the gym--so I really shouldn't be complaining too much. But I'm especially worried because of what's sitting on the desk next to me...
Paula Deen's Double Chocolate Ooey Gooey Butter Cake.
Oh, my God. This stuff is like mainlining chocolate. It takes two sticks of butter and a pound of powdered sugar. There's a whole box of chocolate cake mix. There are eggs and vanilla. And cream cheese. Is there anything not heavenly about this cake?
Anyway, this is my birthday cake. A coworker made it for me (and has made it for me the past few birthdays). Yes, tomorrow's my birthday--I'm turning 29 for the fifth time, for anyone keeping score. And the whole cake is sitting here, looking at me. Daring me, perhaps. I must resist. And we'll probably go out to dinner too. Dang it.
This birthday is going to be a rough one, cake temptation aside. Just another family holiday on the list of "first one without Mom". Like all the other family holidays so far (Mother's Day, my parents' anniversary, my anniversary), it's definitely going to suck. Of course, just the fact that Mom isn't here for it is enough to make it a downer, but there are other factors involved. As far as dates go, tomorrow is not just my birthday; it's six months to the day since Mom passed away. Not really the kind of day you want to celebrate. And my birthday comes two days before what would have been my mom's 64th birthday. Mom always said I was the best early birthday present she ever got, and it's just one more reminder that the best present I could have for my birthday this year is the one I can't have at all. I just miss her so much.
So think of me tomorrow, and on Monday as I say a little birthday prayer to my mom. I don't feel like celebrating much.
1 comment:
I know what you're saying about Mom's birthday, and all of the "firsts". Mother's Day and their anniversary were the worst, more so because they were so close to when she died and they directly involved Dad. I'm really not looking forward to dealing with Thanksgiving and Christmas. DAPGF and I will do our buffet for Thanksgiving (I guess Dad's been invited somewhere...we were going to take him with us, probably to the Hotel Del or something) and Christmas will be with her family. It's gonna be weird.
Happy pre-birthday (not sure if our gift is there yet), and screw it! Eat the freaking cake! I'm getting twitches just reading about it, and your description was like some sort of pr0n article. When you do eat it, I expect a full writeup on the experience. So you kick off the weight loss in earnest on Monday. You're 29 (again). New year. Perfect time for a new start. Good luck leeetle seeester.
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