Considering the fact that Chinese food is my food-heroin (along with Mexican), this picture made perfect sense.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Sometimes, something good happens when you really, really need it. On a day when I've been fighting a screaming headache and have not felt any motivation to do anything, I got a little piece of happy dropped into my lap.
I teach at a private school, and alumni are always encouraged to come and visit and see all the fabulous things that are happening at the school (and then, of course, they are asked to cough up a donation or two to pay for such wonderful things). As a consequence, former students are forever dropping by and roaming the hallways. It's always fun to see former students and spend a few moments catching up with them, although I've discovered the ones who come back and visit the most are often the ones we were so glad to be rid of in the first place--the ones I really want to see are usually the ones who are leading such fantastically successful and fun lives that they don't have time to come back and check out the new library.
So I was absolutely overjoyed to see the face that appeared at my door today, conveniently NOT during one of my classes. This former student was a member of the first class I ever taught at this school, automatically earning her a place in my heart. But she was one of the really great kids; I would never play favorites with students currently in my classes, but with a graduate I can safely say she's one of the favorites I've ever taught. I'm sure this girl has said something unpleasant to someone in the course of her life, but I'd be hardpressed to tell you where or when or to whom, because it sure wasn't here. Sweet, hard-working, funny, clever, gorgeous...I'm blessed to have taught a whole group of girls like this. If I have kids, I want one like this.
Kids like this bring out the best in everyone. Teachers try harder when they have students who work hard and do their best; it's sad but true. And other students respond to people like this. A classic example of this came at the end of this student's freshman year. The weekend before exams, this student's house caught fire and burned to the ground. It was an errant lightning strike, and thankfully the family was not home, but they lost many of their possessions, including some of their pets (which breaks your heart anyway). The lightning actually struck this girl's room, so the devastation of her belongings was total. Clothing, school books, everything gone. So this sweet little thing shows up to school on the day before exams in street clothes (private school=uniforms) with no books and informs everyone she plans to take her exams anyway. Who wouldn't bend over backwards for this kid? Her classmates xeroxed their notes and lent her their textbooks so she could study. She took all her tests and did very well on them, just as she would have if her house had not burned down. On the last day of exams, all the freshmen were called into the hallway. The girls all sat along the lockers, and this girl was called forward by the class president and some of her friends. The students explained that they wanted her to have a good summer and not worry about all her belongings and clothes, and then they presented her with gifts. Clothes. Books. CDs. Shoes. Makeup. Everything a teenage girl could ask for. And then they handed her the gift cards. Visa gift cards loaded with money so she could go shopping anywhere she wanted for anything she needed. That's how much her classmates loved and respected her. They wanted to take care of her.
It was the first time I cried, as a teacher. This is what learning's all about. Grammar and math and languages are great, but this girl taught her classmates, and they taught her back, that caring about someone and taking care of someone is the most important thing you'll ever do.
The face of this girl at my door today brought it all back to me. She thanked me for preparing her so well for college (she said she aced her composition class). And she was genuinely happy to see me and to reminisce.
These girls, they're why I teach. They are my happy thoughts, my marbles (remember Hook with Robin Williams, where the one Lost Boy had lost his marbles, which were his happy thoughts?). Without them, I'm not a teacher at all.
I teach at a private school, and alumni are always encouraged to come and visit and see all the fabulous things that are happening at the school (and then, of course, they are asked to cough up a donation or two to pay for such wonderful things). As a consequence, former students are forever dropping by and roaming the hallways. It's always fun to see former students and spend a few moments catching up with them, although I've discovered the ones who come back and visit the most are often the ones we were so glad to be rid of in the first place--the ones I really want to see are usually the ones who are leading such fantastically successful and fun lives that they don't have time to come back and check out the new library.
So I was absolutely overjoyed to see the face that appeared at my door today, conveniently NOT during one of my classes. This former student was a member of the first class I ever taught at this school, automatically earning her a place in my heart. But she was one of the really great kids; I would never play favorites with students currently in my classes, but with a graduate I can safely say she's one of the favorites I've ever taught. I'm sure this girl has said something unpleasant to someone in the course of her life, but I'd be hardpressed to tell you where or when or to whom, because it sure wasn't here. Sweet, hard-working, funny, clever, gorgeous...I'm blessed to have taught a whole group of girls like this. If I have kids, I want one like this.
Kids like this bring out the best in everyone. Teachers try harder when they have students who work hard and do their best; it's sad but true. And other students respond to people like this. A classic example of this came at the end of this student's freshman year. The weekend before exams, this student's house caught fire and burned to the ground. It was an errant lightning strike, and thankfully the family was not home, but they lost many of their possessions, including some of their pets (which breaks your heart anyway). The lightning actually struck this girl's room, so the devastation of her belongings was total. Clothing, school books, everything gone. So this sweet little thing shows up to school on the day before exams in street clothes (private school=uniforms) with no books and informs everyone she plans to take her exams anyway. Who wouldn't bend over backwards for this kid? Her classmates xeroxed their notes and lent her their textbooks so she could study. She took all her tests and did very well on them, just as she would have if her house had not burned down. On the last day of exams, all the freshmen were called into the hallway. The girls all sat along the lockers, and this girl was called forward by the class president and some of her friends. The students explained that they wanted her to have a good summer and not worry about all her belongings and clothes, and then they presented her with gifts. Clothes. Books. CDs. Shoes. Makeup. Everything a teenage girl could ask for. And then they handed her the gift cards. Visa gift cards loaded with money so she could go shopping anywhere she wanted for anything she needed. That's how much her classmates loved and respected her. They wanted to take care of her.
It was the first time I cried, as a teacher. This is what learning's all about. Grammar and math and languages are great, but this girl taught her classmates, and they taught her back, that caring about someone and taking care of someone is the most important thing you'll ever do.
The face of this girl at my door today brought it all back to me. She thanked me for preparing her so well for college (she said she aced her composition class). And she was genuinely happy to see me and to reminisce.
These girls, they're why I teach. They are my happy thoughts, my marbles (remember Hook with Robin Williams, where the one Lost Boy had lost his marbles, which were his happy thoughts?). Without them, I'm not a teacher at all.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
This morning--194.8.
Huh. Maybe there is something to this whole working out thing after all. I am sore as hell, though. I lifted weights yesterday and today in the hopes of toning up the junk in my trunk. Working out is supposed to make you feel better and have more energy, but I'm really tired and really sore. I hope the "feeling better" thing shows up sooner rather than later.
Anyway, I get regular updates from a weight-loss site (is there irony? perhaps). One of the recent ones had to do with weight-loss sabotage. While the article spent quite a bit of time talking about other people sabotaging your weight loss goals for a variety of reasons, there was a segment about sabotaging your own goals. I found that section very interesting because I am so often guilty of it.
1. Setting unrealistic expectations or having impossible goals. While I would love to think that the jeans that fit me when I was a senior in college might someday fit again, I have to accept the fact that my body has actually changed dimensions, regardless of the fat or lack thereof. I have a pair of size 3 board shorts that I used to love, tucked away in my closet as a reminder of my former glory (so to speak). If I hold those up to my body, I can plainly see that my hip bones, not my fat but my BONES, are now wider than the shorts. I will never wear them again, and there is NOTHING that can be done about it. So trying to get down to the size I was in college is both ridiculous and a tremendous waste of time. So is the goal of losing more than a pound or so each week, every week. I have never sustained such a weight loss week after week at any time in my 34 years of life--there is NO way I could expect to lose that kind of weight on a regular basis now. Yes, I may have a week where I drop 3 pounds, but that should be a surprise for which to be thankful, not an occurrence to be expected.
2. Following an overly restrictive diet. I must face the facts that a) I love to eat and B) I need food. I cannot live on 800 calories a day, or even a 1000. I get cranky and easily distracted, and I cease being a productive or even remotely enjoyable person. What I need to focus on is portion control, since I can easily put down 1500 calories in a sitting if I'm at a restaurant, and avoiding the foods that are most destructive, fat- and calorie-wise.
3. Doing too much exercise too soon. Yeah, I know, that's exactly what I'm guilty of yesterday and today. Instead of starting slowly because I haven't really worked out in three weeks, I spent about an hour each morning lifting weights and doing crunches, and now I can barely move. I need to ease into this a little better than I'm doing. Of course, now that I've put in two days, I need to stretch. A lot. Ow.
4. Overbooking. If I would take a little more time to organize myself, and dedicate a little time here and a little time there to the things I need to do, I would have more time here and there to do the other things I need and want, like working out and reading. I also take on more projects and things than I need to. Everyone needs a little "me" time, and that may mean not offering to make a dish for a staff party, but instead picking up something ready-made at the store.
5. Making excuses. A guy I used to work for said, "Excuses are like armpits. Everyone has a couple and they all stink." I am the master excuser. I can justify missing a workout with things like, "Well, I had to do the dishes, so I skipped the workout", or "I'll just go for a run later instead of going to the gym," or "I'll work out twice as hard tomorrow, but I really want to go home and watch that show right now." I need to stop the excuses and make the workouts the only things (well, and work I suppose) that are graven in stone. I MUST WORK OUT. No excuses. I tend to think of my students at times like this. They work so hard to AVOID doing their work. If they'd only put that kind of effort into actually DOING the work, they'd all have really good grades. I should be like that with exercise. Instead of trying to avoid it, I should put the avoidance energy into the gym.
6. Being a slave to the scale. I do this one daily. Every day I weigh myself (in the morning), and then I kick myself all day long if I've gained. But I know as well as anyone that my weight fluctuates quite a bit on a day-to-day basis. So I really should not worry as much about the daily weigh-ins, and start just recording a weekly weigh-in instead. That way I don't depress myself when things don't go as I want them.
So anyway, I'm on track, for now. I'm gonna go stretch now. Ow.
Huh. Maybe there is something to this whole working out thing after all. I am sore as hell, though. I lifted weights yesterday and today in the hopes of toning up the junk in my trunk. Working out is supposed to make you feel better and have more energy, but I'm really tired and really sore. I hope the "feeling better" thing shows up sooner rather than later.
Anyway, I get regular updates from a weight-loss site (is there irony? perhaps). One of the recent ones had to do with weight-loss sabotage. While the article spent quite a bit of time talking about other people sabotaging your weight loss goals for a variety of reasons, there was a segment about sabotaging your own goals. I found that section very interesting because I am so often guilty of it.
1. Setting unrealistic expectations or having impossible goals. While I would love to think that the jeans that fit me when I was a senior in college might someday fit again, I have to accept the fact that my body has actually changed dimensions, regardless of the fat or lack thereof. I have a pair of size 3 board shorts that I used to love, tucked away in my closet as a reminder of my former glory (so to speak). If I hold those up to my body, I can plainly see that my hip bones, not my fat but my BONES, are now wider than the shorts. I will never wear them again, and there is NOTHING that can be done about it. So trying to get down to the size I was in college is both ridiculous and a tremendous waste of time. So is the goal of losing more than a pound or so each week, every week. I have never sustained such a weight loss week after week at any time in my 34 years of life--there is NO way I could expect to lose that kind of weight on a regular basis now. Yes, I may have a week where I drop 3 pounds, but that should be a surprise for which to be thankful, not an occurrence to be expected.
2. Following an overly restrictive diet. I must face the facts that a) I love to eat and B) I need food. I cannot live on 800 calories a day, or even a 1000. I get cranky and easily distracted, and I cease being a productive or even remotely enjoyable person. What I need to focus on is portion control, since I can easily put down 1500 calories in a sitting if I'm at a restaurant, and avoiding the foods that are most destructive, fat- and calorie-wise.
3. Doing too much exercise too soon. Yeah, I know, that's exactly what I'm guilty of yesterday and today. Instead of starting slowly because I haven't really worked out in three weeks, I spent about an hour each morning lifting weights and doing crunches, and now I can barely move. I need to ease into this a little better than I'm doing. Of course, now that I've put in two days, I need to stretch. A lot. Ow.
4. Overbooking. If I would take a little more time to organize myself, and dedicate a little time here and a little time there to the things I need to do, I would have more time here and there to do the other things I need and want, like working out and reading. I also take on more projects and things than I need to. Everyone needs a little "me" time, and that may mean not offering to make a dish for a staff party, but instead picking up something ready-made at the store.
5. Making excuses. A guy I used to work for said, "Excuses are like armpits. Everyone has a couple and they all stink." I am the master excuser. I can justify missing a workout with things like, "Well, I had to do the dishes, so I skipped the workout", or "I'll just go for a run later instead of going to the gym," or "I'll work out twice as hard tomorrow, but I really want to go home and watch that show right now." I need to stop the excuses and make the workouts the only things (well, and work I suppose) that are graven in stone. I MUST WORK OUT. No excuses. I tend to think of my students at times like this. They work so hard to AVOID doing their work. If they'd only put that kind of effort into actually DOING the work, they'd all have really good grades. I should be like that with exercise. Instead of trying to avoid it, I should put the avoidance energy into the gym.
6. Being a slave to the scale. I do this one daily. Every day I weigh myself (in the morning), and then I kick myself all day long if I've gained. But I know as well as anyone that my weight fluctuates quite a bit on a day-to-day basis. So I really should not worry as much about the daily weigh-ins, and start just recording a weekly weigh-in instead. That way I don't depress myself when things don't go as I want them.
So anyway, I'm on track, for now. I'm gonna go stretch now. Ow.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Weigh-in: 196.4
Today was the first day of...well...whatever it's called when you start over again (for like the 50th time). I dragged my sorry butt out of bed this morning and hit the gym. I will either golf this afternoon (perhaps the driving range, or maybe 9 holes) or I will go back to the gym again. I will repeat this process over and over until I manage to lose some weight, or until the apocalypse, whatever comes first.
The biggest problem I have with the gym in the morning is that it makes me HUNGRY. It must kickstart my metabolism, because then I crave food. All day long. No matter what I eat. So when I work out in the morning it becomes a game of portion control and self-restraint. Otherwise, I'll easily take in enough calories to negate whatever good I did at the gym in the first place.
And I crave steak. Meh.
Today was the first day of...well...whatever it's called when you start over again (for like the 50th time). I dragged my sorry butt out of bed this morning and hit the gym. I will either golf this afternoon (perhaps the driving range, or maybe 9 holes) or I will go back to the gym again. I will repeat this process over and over until I manage to lose some weight, or until the apocalypse, whatever comes first.
The biggest problem I have with the gym in the morning is that it makes me HUNGRY. It must kickstart my metabolism, because then I crave food. All day long. No matter what I eat. So when I work out in the morning it becomes a game of portion control and self-restraint. Otherwise, I'll easily take in enough calories to negate whatever good I did at the gym in the first place.
And I crave steak. Meh.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Well, I drank my last soda today. Probably. I hope.
I've been drinking diet sodas for quite a long time now, thinking I was being so clever avoiding all those extra calories. But now so much is coming to light about how bad DIET sodas are for you, that it seems we should cut them out of our diets altogether.
Sodas are bad for you in many ways. When you drink a soda, you inhale the carbon dioxide from the bubbles. Carbon dioxide is heavier than air, so it sinks in your lungs and actually takes up valuable space in your lungs. This makes it impossible for you to get as full a breath as you would otherwise be capable of. Many coaches prefer their athletes not drink carbonated beverages, to maximize their air intake.
Also, sodas not only prevent calcium being absorbed by your system but also actually leach calcium from your bones, possibly contributing to osteoporosis.
The acid in sodas eats at the enamel of your teeth, contributing to cavities, and the caramel coloring can stain your teeth.
Caffeine is a diuretic and known addictive stimulant.
Those are just a few of the issues to which sodas contribute. But recent studies of diet sodas suggest there is another problem. Diet sodas were created for those who were concerned with the number of calories they were consuming. The substitution of artificial sweeteners for the already non-nutritious high-fructose corn syrup was supposed to help people lose weight. Instead, some studies show that people who consume large amounts of diet sodas may actually gain weight rather than lose it.
One of the possible reasons could be that the taste of the sweet drink "tricks" the system into thinking that something with calories has been consumed, and the system then starts "looking" for those calories. When no calories are found, it may actually trigger the system into wanting to consume more calories to make up for those that are missing. So one might end up actually eating more calories rather than fewer.
No idea if that's true or not, but it's getting to the point where the diet sodas aren't helping me anyway, so I should probably just drop them. I need to just replace them with water, or iced tea if I really need the caffeine.
I don't know if it will help, but it obviously can't hurt.
I've been drinking diet sodas for quite a long time now, thinking I was being so clever avoiding all those extra calories. But now so much is coming to light about how bad DIET sodas are for you, that it seems we should cut them out of our diets altogether.
Sodas are bad for you in many ways. When you drink a soda, you inhale the carbon dioxide from the bubbles. Carbon dioxide is heavier than air, so it sinks in your lungs and actually takes up valuable space in your lungs. This makes it impossible for you to get as full a breath as you would otherwise be capable of. Many coaches prefer their athletes not drink carbonated beverages, to maximize their air intake.
Also, sodas not only prevent calcium being absorbed by your system but also actually leach calcium from your bones, possibly contributing to osteoporosis.
The acid in sodas eats at the enamel of your teeth, contributing to cavities, and the caramel coloring can stain your teeth.
Caffeine is a diuretic and known addictive stimulant.
Those are just a few of the issues to which sodas contribute. But recent studies of diet sodas suggest there is another problem. Diet sodas were created for those who were concerned with the number of calories they were consuming. The substitution of artificial sweeteners for the already non-nutritious high-fructose corn syrup was supposed to help people lose weight. Instead, some studies show that people who consume large amounts of diet sodas may actually gain weight rather than lose it.
One of the possible reasons could be that the taste of the sweet drink "tricks" the system into thinking that something with calories has been consumed, and the system then starts "looking" for those calories. When no calories are found, it may actually trigger the system into wanting to consume more calories to make up for those that are missing. So one might end up actually eating more calories rather than fewer.
No idea if that's true or not, but it's getting to the point where the diet sodas aren't helping me anyway, so I should probably just drop them. I need to just replace them with water, or iced tea if I really need the caffeine.
I don't know if it will help, but it obviously can't hurt.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Monday, March 16, 2009
So.
Back from my kayaking trip, first day back from Spring Break, time for a report.
EPIC FAIL.
On the weight issue, I mentioned my failure last week on the drive to eastern Tennessee. My target weight for last week was 185. My actual weight was almost 200. Despite my protestations, I simply couldn't get my act together. Rarely hit the gym, rarely followed a coherent eating plan, and it certainly showed.
On the "hoping to move" issue, we're still here. At this point, we're glad to at least have jobs, as so many others have lost theirs. It's a bad time to be looking to make a change, so we're still in a bit of a holding pattern. Still looking, but we figure it may take a little while. We don't really want to buy a house here, as it will just tie us down, and while moving into a nicer rental would be great it probably would cost us more each month, thereby cutting into the money we're trying to save. So I guess we'll just stay in our current house and make the best of it.
On the kayaking front, this past weekend was not what I had hoped for. Part of it is my weight--I'm over the maximum weight for my boat, which makes it harder to handle--and part of it is my own mental weirdness, but I've really regressed in my paddling. A few summers ago (aligning with my lightest weight since starting to kayak, interestingly enough) I was feeling good about my abilities and kind of psyching myself up to step up to harder rivers. Since then, I've chickened out on more than a few trips, I've had some swims on some rivers that I had plenty of experience on and hadn't struggled with before, and my eskimo roll seems to have some consistency issues.
So I have a lot to work on. My new goal is to have dealt with and made progress on these issues by the time we get to my summer vacation (last week in May). That's 10 weeks from now. Hopefully I can get this back on track, before I just give up entirely.
Back from my kayaking trip, first day back from Spring Break, time for a report.
EPIC FAIL.
On the weight issue, I mentioned my failure last week on the drive to eastern Tennessee. My target weight for last week was 185. My actual weight was almost 200. Despite my protestations, I simply couldn't get my act together. Rarely hit the gym, rarely followed a coherent eating plan, and it certainly showed.
On the "hoping to move" issue, we're still here. At this point, we're glad to at least have jobs, as so many others have lost theirs. It's a bad time to be looking to make a change, so we're still in a bit of a holding pattern. Still looking, but we figure it may take a little while. We don't really want to buy a house here, as it will just tie us down, and while moving into a nicer rental would be great it probably would cost us more each month, thereby cutting into the money we're trying to save. So I guess we'll just stay in our current house and make the best of it.
On the kayaking front, this past weekend was not what I had hoped for. Part of it is my weight--I'm over the maximum weight for my boat, which makes it harder to handle--and part of it is my own mental weirdness, but I've really regressed in my paddling. A few summers ago (aligning with my lightest weight since starting to kayak, interestingly enough) I was feeling good about my abilities and kind of psyching myself up to step up to harder rivers. Since then, I've chickened out on more than a few trips, I've had some swims on some rivers that I had plenty of experience on and hadn't struggled with before, and my eskimo roll seems to have some consistency issues.
So I have a lot to work on. My new goal is to have dealt with and made progress on these issues by the time we get to my summer vacation (last week in May). That's 10 weeks from now. Hopefully I can get this back on track, before I just give up entirely.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Short post from my iPhone. On the way to our kayaking trip. Disappointed to report utter failure on the weight loss/exercise front. Today was my day of reckoning. My January goal was to have lost about 15 lbs by today and be in some semblance of shape. Nope. Today's weigh-in: 198.6. I never did find a handle on either the exercise routine or the eating habits. Well, it is what it is, as my husband says. I'll just have to do what I can this weekend, and start over when we return. I suppose my new goal will be comparable to my previous one, with my summer break as the deadline. *sigh* I'm getting to old for this s#it.
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
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